Johnny Depp is still pretty much the sexiest man I’ve ever seen, and this movie proves yet another awesome thing about him; he can sing. Our anti-hero, ST arrives in London and immediately sets out for revenge against the man who framed him, stole his woman, and trapped his daughter in a lonely existence many years prior. And since people who steal other people’s womans deserve to have their throats slit with razor-sharp razors, ST’s methods for revenge are practically perfect. I have decided that musicals with strange, creepy songs and little to no dancing are the jam. But none of that even compares to seeing a ton of people getting huge gashes sliced into their necks on camera, complete with blood-spurting action from the jugulars; dropped into the basement through a hole in the floor, and made into meat pies for the citizens of London to enjoy. I love it when that junk happens. This one gets 3.5 flames on the scale, due to the fact that Helena Bonham Carter is weird and freaks me out.

The classic urban coming-of-age tale about two brothers who sell drugs, kill people, and then tragically lose the mighty empire they have built together. The basic premise of the story is that two horrible actors (Wesley Snipes and Michael Wright) play drug-dealing gangster brothers who become caught up in business deals that lead them down a path to death and destruction. I’ll save you the trouble of watching this movie by telling you that it is incredibly dumb.

From back in the days when Ben Foster was just some kid actor on the Disney Channel to his role here, you’d think he was a schizophrenic. He’s absolutely chilling as the villain in this action thriller. That’s three ill words in a row, so it should be pretty obvious that I’m trying to make it seem like I know what I’m talking about.

Even a blind monkey with attention deficit disorder would be floored by Foster’s wicked presence as a dangerous and unrelenting criminal. While his two accomplices seem to be amateur mischief-makers - just some kids looking to get into trouble - Foster assumes the role of the evil overlord, goading them into deeper and more troubling behavior as the film goes on. Bruce Willis takes on the good guy role of hostage negotiator in an attempt to rescue the victims of the film - some kids trapped in their own house by the three subversive youths. Overall a very nice piece of filmmaking, worth a watch.